Do you sometimes find yourself feeling worried or anxious about anything or everything?
If your answer is yes, you are not alone, being worried or anxious about something is a natural human response that ALL people experience.
Your brain is a thought-producing machine that spits out all sorts of ideas, many of them sometimes are very unpleasant.
Thanks to the most primitive part of our brains, our “reptilian brain”, we receive a constant flow of “lack” or “attack” messages translated as scary thoughts:
“ I am not good enough”, “I am not worthy”, “I can’t do it”, “the worst case scenario is going to happen”, “I won’t have enough___”, “I will be out of___”,”I will get sick with___”, etc.
If we don’t pay attention and automatically believe these fearful thoughts, we may end up acting in a way that will make all of our worst fears a true reality!
Rachel, one of my clients, was constantly afraid of being overweight for the rest of her life.
Every time she had this fear she got really anxious and began eating anything she could in order to feel better.
Luckily she realized that she had a problem and began making some changes in her lifestyle.
We worked together on helping her to overcome the anxiety and fears that were the real cause of her binging behavior.
Once her mindset changed she was inspired to establish new healthy habits, and after a few months, she returned to her normal weight.
Can you imagine what could have happened to Rachel if she believed her fears and continued to have the same binging behavior every time she worried about her weight?
So here are 3 things that you can start doing TODAY to help you whenever you are worried:
- Identify Your Fears Through Your Body:
Many times when you are experiencing physical discomfort your body is trying to give you a very important message.
When you are angry, afraid, upset, shameful, regretful or anxious about something, you will probably feel chest pains, tightness in your belly, heart area, throat or shoulder’s. You may also have a headache, nausea, etc.
When you notice any of these symptoms, pause for a moment to take a few deep breaths.
Realize that your “reptilian brain” is being very active, and begin to observe and name the fearful thoughts that may be popping up in your head.
See these thoughts just as a natural activity of your mind, which you can accept and learn to manage.
2. Focus on the Present Moment:
Pay attention to where you are right now. Feel the clothes you are wearing and notice room’s temperature, look at the colors around you, identify all the sounds that you may be hearing and identify any smells.
Since the mind cannot focus 100% on two things simultaneously, focusing on the here and now will help you to release your attachment to imaginary fearful scenarios that probably will never even happen and only cause you anxiety.
“I am an old man and have known many troubles, but most of them never happened.” – Mark Twain
3. Question Your Thoughts:
Don’t believe everything you are thinking. Ask yourself:
1) Can I be absolutely sure that what I think is true?
2) Can I find at least 3 reasons why the opposite of what I think, may also be true?
These two powerful questions open your mind to new possibilities, reduce your stress, and bring a little hope into your life.
For example, if your fear is: “I am not going to have money if I lose my job”, proof yourself with facts how this may not be entirely true:
- “I have expertise that I can take with me and apply for a similar job”
- “If I lose this job, I could be able to find another in a different industry that I may also enjoy”
- “I can start my own business”
- “I can get a “transitional” job. Working in a restaurant, for example, could tip me well enough to bring food to my table while I find my ideal job.”
This kind of “new” thinking weakens your “old” fears and makes new positive connections in your mind so that you can focus your attention into new possibilities.
Identifying your fears, focusing on the present moment, and questioning your thoughts are just a few coaching tips that can help you to overcome your fears and manage your anxiety.
The aim is always to learn to control your mind instead of allowing your mind to control you.
Try these tips with some of your most scary thoughts and please share this blog with someone that could benefit from them!
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